Funny Jokes - Miscellaneous Jokes
Miscellaneous Jokes
What did the beach say to the incoming tide
What did the beach say to the incoming tide?Long time no sea!
Joke Permalink: http://www.funny-jokes.net/viewjoke/11740.html
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What is the difference between a Harley and a vacuum?
What is the difference between a Harley and a vacuum?Thhe dirtbag is in a different place!!
Joke Permalink: http://www.funny-jokes.net/viewjoke/11528.html
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Miscellaneous Jokes joke #11756
yo mama is so fat, that she sat on a dollar and made four quarters.Joke Permalink: http://www.funny-jokes.net/viewjoke/11756.html
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How did Burger King get Dairy queen pregnant.
How did Burger King get Dairy queen pregnant?He forgot to wrap his whopper!
Joke Permalink: http://www.funny-jokes.net/viewjoke/11791.html
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Great Anagrams
original anagram ****** ****** dormitory..................dirty room evangelist.................evil's agent desperation................a rope ends it the Morse Code.............here come dots slot machines..............cash lost in 'em animosity..................is no amity mother-in-law..............woman Hitler snooze alarms..............alas! no more Zs Alec Guinness..............genuine class Semolina...................is no meal the public art galleries...large picture halls, I bet a decimal point............I'm a dot in place the earthquakes............that queer shake eleven plus two............twelve plus one contradiction..............accord not in itJoke Permalink: http://www.funny-jokes.net/viewjoke/11794.html
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Funny signs around America
Here's some funny signs around the country that you can keepan eye out for on your next trip...
On a California freeway:
Fine for Littering
In a New York jewelry store:
Genuine Faux Pearls
In a Boston fast-food parking lot:
Parking for Drive-Through Customers Only
Billboard on Florida highway:
If You Can't Read, We Can Help
On the Triborough Bridge in New York:
In Event of Air Attack Drive Off Bridge
On a Lockhart, Texas, gas station and mini-mart:
We're out of Rolaids, but we've got gas.
At the basketball court in a Gastonton, North Carolina, YMCA:
Anyone caught hanging from the rim will be suspended
In a Grand Rapids restaurant:
Half baked chicken
In a Dayton barbershop:
During vacation of owner, a competent hair stylist will be
here
On a Jacksonville, Florida, bookstore:
Rare, out-of-print, and nonexistent books
On the wall of a British Columbia cleaning service:
Able to Do the Worst Possible Job
Joke Permalink: http://www.funny-jokes.net/viewjoke/11929.html
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Bored Man vs 10 yr old Girl
A guy was seated next to a 10-year-old girl on an airplane. Being bored, he turned to the girl and said, "Let's talk. I've heard that flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger."The girl, who was reading a book, closed it slowly and said to the guy, "What would you like to talk about?"
Oh, I don't know," said the guy. "How about nuclear power?"
"OK," she said. "That could be an interesting topic. But let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow and a deer all eat the same stuff... grass. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?"
The guy thought about it and said, "Hmmm, I have no idea."
To which the girl replied, "Do you really feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don't know shit?"
Joke Permalink: http://www.funny-jokes.net/viewjoke/11964.html
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Pirate Camoflauge Clothing
There once was pirate captain who, whenever it looked like a battle would be imminent would change into a red shirt. After observing this behavior for a few months, one of the crew members asked him what it meant."It's in case I get shot. I don't want you crew members to see blood and freak out."
"That's very sensible, sir." At that moment, the crew member spotted eight hostile ships on the horizon. The captain all of a sudden looked very concerned.
"Get my brown pants."
Joke Permalink: http://www.funny-jokes.net/viewjoke/11984.html